The Party Life of Silvan Colani
1 August 2005 - Swiss National Day
I was recently invited to be the MC (Master of Ceremony) at the official 1 August celebrations organized by the Swiss Association of Hong Kong (SAHK). Not being very patriotic myself (quite the opposite, in fact) this certainly came as a bit of a surprise. Nevertheless, it sounded like an interesting challenge and so I accepted without much hesitation.
How much of a challenge it would be became clear to me as I tried to put together a table of a few Swiss friends - all long-term residents in Hong Kong of around my age - as loyal supporters in the back in case all my jokes would fall flat. "Boring", "very boring" and "way too boring" was the general response I got when trying to encourage their participation. "But I'll be the MC - it'll be fun!" I tried to convince them - in vain. "I'm not coming unless you promise me ten Sexy Heidis on that day!" one said, a wish I was unlikely to fulfill with the budget I was given (nil).
In the end, I still managed to force two tables of colleagues and friends to attend, mostly on the promise of good Swiss food and unlimited free drinks during cocktails!
So why would these like-minded Swiss rather go running in the woods on a Monday night then spending it at the Hong Kong Jockey Club in the presence of their fellow countrymen? Is it the long speeches, the singing of the national anthem or the blowing of the alphorn - surely not the latter!
As I learned (and expected) from the preparation meetings for the event, there was a given format for the night - copied and perfected over the years - which did not leave too much room to improvise. The speeches had to stay, the national anthem had to be sung and Wally Nahr and Eric Kotz kindly agreed to play the alphorn and accordion to the delight of the crowd. There was just enough time to squeeze in my "Be A Good Swiss Quiz" which I hoped would sufficiently challenge the assembled patriots.
As with any Swiss event, there was some controversy from the start: whether or not the SAHK banner should be hung and where (the 1 August party in Hong Kong is one of the few not organized by the consulate, but by the Association) and whether or not it was appropriate to present the outgoing Deputy Consul with a present. Somehow, we managed to find a Swiss-style compromise on both.
I was also put in charge of music - something I wouldn't mind at a "normal" party. But at the 1 August party that meant playing Swiss music, something many associate with "Hudigaegeler". But if I was going to put my mark on this event, I had to deviate significantly from this traditional approach. So I kicked the night off to the tune of Switzerland's ultimate rocker, Polo Hofer and "Hopp Schwiiz".
With the 120 guests seated promptly, it was time to get the speeches out of the way. I kept my remarks short and funny (I thought…, but then again, the Swiss are a tough crowd to please) and hoped the others would do the same. Serge Fafallen, 1st VP of the SAHK was next followed by the Deputy Consul followed by the President of the Swiss Confederation (by CD) by which time (yawn!) over half an hour had passed.
Now it was time to get up and sing the National Anthem, unintentionally one of the funnier moments of the night as people stand awkwardly and uncomfortably trying to murmur along to a song nobody really remembers or recognizes - except the consular staff and hard-core patriots, of course.
Then it was time to open the buffet, and while the quality and diversity of the food provided was superb (including such Swiss delights as sushi and oysters), many missed more simple pleasures like a good Bratwurst or Cervelat. Not surprisingly, the longest queue was for the raclette, as it always is at these events. The trick is to have the raclette FIRST, while everybody still fights over the oysters!
After Wally Nahr's Alphorn performance it was time for my "Be A Good Swiss Quiz" a table competition covering such wide angles as naming the seven Swiss Federal Councilors to knowing how many people are in a Hornussen team (16 or 18). Interestingly enough, almost every table knew the reigning Miss Switzerland (Fiona Hefti from Zurich) but few could recall the results of the National Ice Hokey final (Davos vs. ZSC Lions, 4:1). The most creative answer to the question "When will Switzerland join the EU?" was: "The day the EU joins Switzerland". Rather embarrassingly, the winning table was my own and although I had not leaked any of the answers I decided to also award a round of drinks to the second-placed table, just to avoid any further controversy.
The night was quickly drawing to an end with the traditional draw of the "Loesli" prices. The top price - as always, but possibly for the last time in 2005 - was a Swiss Air return ticket to Zurich. Let's hope Lufthansa keeps up the tradition!
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